when maggie nelson said to live with your puny, vulnerable self

...i felt that (plus a recipe for a simple, cosy tomato soup)

i do not want to fall in love any time soon.

i downloaded hinge the other night in a quiet moment of boredom while sitting in my bed in my empty apartment. it asked me to upload six photos, i uploaded one. it told me to use a prompt to caption my photo as a conversation starter! it will bring more matches! i didn’t want to choose a prompt to caption my one single photo. i couldn’t think of anything more tedious in that moment. instead, i selected my zodiac sign and my pronouns because i felt like that was more than enough. i tried changing the age range but the app wouldn’t let me until i completed more of my profile and uploaded more photos. i suddenly felt so irritated- like this app was playing a trick on me. it was almost like this app was holding me hostage: upload more selfies, show more effort, or you will not be able to window shop for other singles in your area. i buried myself deeper in my bed, relishing the cool parts of the sheets the warmth of my body had not touched yet.

what was the point?